What gives us the idea that we are somehow special and that we will probably become something amazing/accomplish something great?
Does everyone feel that way, I wonder? Are some people happy to just be? Happy to fill their niche and do their part in an unassuming way, content with home and work and what they have become? Or does everyone have this expectation that they are going to stand out among the crowd? And what about the crowd? You need a crowd for someone to stand out of it. Is everyone in the crowd happy to be the crowd? Are some of those who think they should be, or are going to stand out, really meant to?
What if you are meant to be 'one of the crowd' and you have a misguided notion that you should be standing out? It may sound somber, but I think it is valid. I realize I have always - from my not-so-great childhood already- thought that I am very special and that I will stand out from the crowd. Is it a way for a child to reach up into its potential? I remember when I was about 13 hearing a talk on the radio on how hard it is for a person to rise just one level above the level they were born into and how much energy and effort it takes to rise above your circumstances. I also remember deciding that no matter what it takes I will rise above my circumstances.
We were poor, my mom a single mom, my Dad who left us when I was 5 had passed away a year before and there I was, deciding that I will never be average. I am something special and I will be known. Visible. My life will be meaningful in more areas than just domestic or local. It sounds fine, but really, what if everyone feel that way? Who is going to be the crowd? It is obviously rather relative - we cant all be Nelson Mandela or Robert de Niro. Perhaps we can comfort ourselves with a lot of philosophy and pondering the meaning of life and how 'every effort is worthwhile no matter how insignificant.' But that simply doesnt answer my question right now and it doesnt still the longing to rise.
That brings me to the next question - those people who rose above the crowd - really rose above - did they want to? Did they decide to? Did they also feel somehow that they are special? Did they expect to rise and be famous or significant? Was it conscious effort? Did they suspect that their life is somehow great or are they really special and automatically rose above the crowd, because unlike those who think they are, they truly are: special.
And then here is the big question: What is the price of rising above the crowd? Is it worth it? For those who work hard at it and accomplish it by effort, exertion and striving AND for those who are so amazing that they quietly and effortlessly rise above the crowd - is the price not too high? I have noticed that in many cases true greatness come from a very broken and disturbed place. There often is a big imbalance and disturbingly burdened soul, or at best a dysfunctional human, behind many of the masters of greatness, whether it is in the arts or politics. I suspect even among the ranks of altruism, there are difficult people behind some of the greatest endeavours.
Final question: What about me? (if anyone replies to this blog with "you ARE special Meleney" I shall scream and probably vomit myself to sleep tonight!! It is not what this is about. I am really simply making this matter personal. Who gave me the right to decide I am going to be one of those who rise above the crowd? Did I decide that myself? Did I set myself up for a lot heartache, hard work and strife? Am I willing to stop striving? The thought makes me shudder. I believe I am more or less at the half way mark in my life. If I have to stop striving and accept that I might have been misguided in my notion of greatness, what will keep me going? I look back at the first half and I am not happy. I have failures that haunt me. I have seen that my desire for 'more' has sometimes robbed me of what I had! But God knows if I have to resign and coast along for the second half of my life and sink into the knowledge that I was never meant to rise above, and that I will probably never reach greatness, I would rather die right now.
Can someone who did rise above the crowd - really, really rose, not just stood on their toes for a few years- please tell me that they also got to this point where I am now and give me the key, the secret? Will they please tell me if it is possible to stop striving and still rise? Is there someone who can tell me that I can surrender and not slip down, but magically coast upward? Is this why Jesus said "This is how you should pray: Our Father in heaven, let Your name be glorified, let Your kingdom come, let Your will be done, on earth as it is in heaven...? I know on an intellectual level that I have no choice. It is always going to be what it is and my striving is not going to force the will of God. But I cant somehow, on an emotional level, accept that I could indeed just surrender and that great things will happen without my effort. Ag crap!! What am I going to do?
Very valid question, and I think one that deserves a different angle. What if there is a lot of crowds, and sometimes you are part of the crowd, and in another you are the one rising out? Like Nelson being the one rising from the stuggle crowd, but are part of the masses in art, music and whatever else?
ReplyDeleteI do believe that we are made to rise, because we are in the image of the One who IS. On top, the best, the Ultimate. But our striving must be focused: to be at rest in Him. That is the ultimate accomplishment, finding the rest in the relationship and resting in the relationship. Wonderful wonderful place to be! And then we will experience that the one who has called you, is COMPLETELY DEPENDABLE, if He said it, He'll do it.
I think the answer to the possibility of still rising without striving lays in the acceptance of Prov 10:22. Strive to love Him.
That is amazing. Thank you!
ReplyDeleteSo, if who we are is created in God's image (or we are a little droplet from the infinite lake which is God, as Rheece aptly puts it) then I rate that makes us pretty darn special indeed!- That is not to say better or more superior to other people, but special in our expression of the outflow of God in us.
ReplyDeleteThere's a saying that goes something like this: “Whether you think you failed or succeeded you are right” Thus, I feel that if people feel like they are not meant to rise above, then they will not, because they will not create the experience that gives rise to the rising above until they realise that their apparent stagnation is not a true expression of what they are fully capable of. Every single person has the potential to do what you are describe, whether that is realised potential might be a different question.
Thanks Jared. I am hoping to gather some more feedback, some of the friends on FB also had interesting comments. I wish I could talk to someone who - in our conventional and 'worldly' view has achieved something unusually amazing. Someone truly famous. I can imagine in the sport world it is a combination of an enormous amount of hard work, dedication, commitment and tenacity MIXED WITH special talent (perhaps a set and combination of genetically acquired attributes) PLUS that something magic, like opportunity/a dedicated trainer/ someone who notices and invests time and effort and that kind of 'right place/right time' thing.
ReplyDeleteI am guessing that, because I do think that 'magic' must happen and that is perhaps the Will of God. There are many talented people who would be willing to work hard etc. but they are maybe underprivileged or the opportunity never comes around.
I am thinking of a scripture that says "Time and chance comes to us all, to the weak and the strong..." Are we going to see that chance and grab it and when we have grabbed it, are we going to hold on? But if it is the will of God and we make the wrong call now and again, do we go around a bit of a detour and face the same choice (hurdle) again? Or is it lost forever? If the 'steps of a good man are ordered by the Lord', what happens when we mess up?
I know we are not pawns but I do somehow think if we are to pray Let Your will be done... it indicates that His Will is not done as a given.
Let the thoughts keep coming please.
Meleney